It was nearing midnight as we sat across the table from each other. Eyes bloodshot from ugly crying, voices hoarse from worshipping and the neon waffle house sign glowing outside the window. Our little group was a ragtag one, just learning how to lead & do life together. His steely blue eyes had this twinkle but mischievous way about them, sort of how I would picture Santa to be. As we waited for our waffles to arrive, he smiled as he looked directly at my husband and in his deep southern accent asked, “So what’s God saying?” but he already knew. He saw it on us from the very beginning. Which is the reason he invited us to tag along to a Vineyard church planting conference. We were young pups in our early twenties, already involved in a ground floor young adult para-ministry and not looking for more to do. But little by little, the Lord had been rekindling & redefining what discipleship looks like within the church and drawing us into His love for His bride. Matt looked at me as tears welled up in his eyes, then looked back at David and said, “I think we’re called to pastor, but it’ll be different. Not sure what that looks like, but I know it’ll be different.” And David replied, “yes, I see that and confirm that in you guys.”
It took us quite a few years to quit chasing the “IT” – the ‘calling’, the ‘dream job’, the one thing we would step into that would automatically give a sense of significance. After all, God kept confirming it to us over and over again. But what it felt like we got was 20 years of hard labor, both literally and spiritually. As we wiped baby butts, filed worship music, mowed lawns, managed people, led small groups, fed the poor and held the hands of the dying… God was in the midst of it all. Loving us relentlessly through His presence & community who modeled this so well. Expanding our heart’s capacity for compassion. Forming us to be more like Him in the deepest, untouched places of our soul.
He was and is our first calling.
When we landed at The Family Room church four years ago, we were truly content with where we were at in our lives. After a few months’ sabbatical, we felt God calling us to leave our beloved church community where we grew deeply in things of the Kingdom & grew in leadership. The plan here at The Family Room was to lay low and serve wherever needed, but keeping relationships at arm’s length. We were pretty happy cleaning church toilets. During this time I had a significant dream where Matt and I entered a house and went from room to room praying and ministering to various people/situations. It was obvious that God wasn’t going to let us ‘hide out’. He continued to bring deep healing & spiritual formation in our hearts that enabled us to open up, love & minister to His bride more fully… which has been a beautiful miracle. With that, he brought alongside us loving pastors & friends in Don & Cheri’ who were just the right balance of gentleness & nudging to help us discover what God was doing & reaffirmed our call to pastor. So very grateful for their presence in our lives. After a 3 year discernment and transition process, we were set in as lead pastors at The Family Room Church.
So here we go! We are excited and a little bit terrified. But mostly we feel so very thankful for His faithfulness every step of the way.
And thankful for waffle houses.
